This made me think of the eating disorder and how it has behaved in the past as a joker in the pack in my life, telling me a complete bunch of lies at times about myself and my own size as well. Causing me to see myself as almost healtty in appearance at times when I was not in reality. Sometimes pushing you that bit more and filling your head with lies about yourself. With a rational mind you can know the truth as well sometimes. It can tell some people it will be their best friend, which is a lie.
Sometimes friends willl come to me about their problems with recovery and that they are full of fluid and it is blown out of proportion and the eating disorder is manipulating them, although they are clearly struggling as well and early days of recovery can be difficult. You have to try and really destract yourself. and stick with it with the help you have.
Everyone can have a joker in the pack. Try and not let that joker in the pack get the best of you.
I wish you all well